Shopping With Hilda Humper

Felicitous Fornicator Hilda Humper stars in:
"Shopping With Hilda Humper"
Written by Chantal Lefleur
Edited by Victor C. Nathan


Hilda got out of her car and walked towards the entrance of the
shopping mall a few blocks from her house, humming to herself as she
made her way across the crowded parking lot. Hilda had been going
through her dresser at home recently and had discarded a lot of
lingerie that had seen better days and now she was excited about
buying new things.

"I like having pretty girly things," Hilda muttered to herself as she
walked. "If I have pretty lingerie to wear, I feel pretty all over."

Once inside the mall, Hilda walked down the corridor and turned
right, entering the third business on the left, her favourite ladies
lingerie shop. They had pretty things, sexy things, and best of all,
downright naughty things and Hilda loved shopping there.

"May I help you, ma'am?" asked the young store clerk, coming towards
her, smiling. "Are you looking for anything in particular?"

"Well," responded Hilda, returning his smile. "I need some new
panties and bras, a few slips, a couple of teddies and perhaps a few
silk camisoles as well. Oh, yeah, and a garter belt. Some of my men
friends really like me to dress up with stockings and garter belt
before they do me. It makes their wee wees hard in no time."

"Then I guess we better start by measuring you, ma'am," he said,
reaching for the tape measure in his pocket.

"Let's see, yes, your waist is about 25 inches," he noted, jotting it
down.

"Not bad for the mother of two children, is it?" Hilda asked proudly.

"And your hips are 36 inches."

"How about my titties?" Hilda inquired, smirking slyly. "Have they
grown any?"

The handsome young salesman took the tape measure in his left hand
and tentatively reached out to put it around her and reached around
with his right hand to grasp the tape and pull it around to the front
to determine her measurement. Hilda's bouncing bodacious boobies were
so huge that in trying to get his two hands to meet behind her, he
ended up with his face buried deep within her cleavage.

"Tee hee hee," Hilda giggled. "They are pretty big, aren't they?"

Finally determining the dimensions of her chest, he turned to face
his pretty customer, telling her that her chest measurement was about
38 inches.

"I think you'll need at least a JJJ cup," he said earnestly. "Or
perhaps even a JJJJ cup. As you can see, your breasts are pretty
full."

"Tee hee hee," responded Hilda, giggling girlishly. "Most men tell me
they're my best feature. Tee hee hee."

"Is there any particular type of bra you would like to look at,
ma'am?" he asked her, putting the tape measure back in his
pocket. "Colour, or type of material?"

"Well," replied Hilda. "I need a bra with good support, obviously,
but I also want it to be pretty and feminine. Well, and sexy of
course. Hee hee."

"Come this way, ma'am," the young man urged her. "I'll show you what
we have in stock."

He led Hilda to the back of the store and showed her the different
styles and fabrics that they carried.

"Oh, my," gasped Hilda. "This fabric feels so smooth and silky. Does
this one come in my size?"

"We have that particular one in a JJ cup, but it is a full cut. It
might just fit you."

"May I try it on?" Hilda asked him politely. "I really like this
style and fabric."

"Of course, ma'am," he replied, picking up the bra and directing
Hilda to the change rooms. "If I can be of any assistance, please let
me know."

Hilda took the bra and entered the first fitting room she came to.
Taking off her jacket and blouse, she then unfastened her bra and put
it on the chair with her clothing. Taking stock of herself in the
mirror, Hilda liked what was reflected back to her.

"I just have the prettiest titties," Hilda observed, smiling. "They
really are my best feature."

Hilda picked up the bra she was trying on and put her arms through
the straps. She always had to wear front closing bras, since it was
virtually impossible for her to reach behind herself and fasten or
unfasten it because her enormous jugs just got in the way. She put
the bra on and tried to draw the two sides together but was having
difficulty making them meet.

"Oh, Mr. Salesman," Hilda called out in her childlike singsong
voice. "Can you come and give me a hand, sweetie pie?"

The young man knocked on the fitting room door and asked how he could
be of assistance. Hilda opened the door, still trying to drag both
sides of the bra together and do up the hooks and eyes.

"This is such a struggle for me," she said, growing frustrated. "Do
you think you could push my boobies together for me while I try to do
it up?"

"Oh, I don't know about that, ma'am," he said, somewhat
anxiously. "It might get me fired."

"Well, now," said Hilda, impatiently. "How is anyone ever going to
find out? I'm not going to say a word. Come on, sweetie. I need your
help."

Blushing to the roots of his hair, the young clerk put a hand on
either side of Hilda's bust and pushed them together, drawing the two
sides of the bra into closer proximity.

"Ah, there's the ticket," she said, finally able to fasten the
garment around herself. "What do you think?"

"Well, ma'am," responded the young clerk, stammering somewhat. "The
bra is pretty, but your chest looks kind of like a couple of
watermelons jammed into grape skins."

"Tee hee hee," Hilda laughed, not at all offended as she got him to
help her take it off. "There is a lot of me spilling over, isn't
there? I guess I need to look at some more of your bras."

Walking back towards the department, the young man grabbed her arm.

"Um, miss," he said uncomfortably. "You can't walk around the store
topless."

"Why the hell not?" Miss Humper queried, dismissing him. "I'm sure
all the other shoppers have seen a pair of fucking titties before,
haven't they?"

"But you might want to think about losing that erection before you go
out there again, sweetie," she said with a saucy wink, grabbing the
tent in his trousers and squeezing gently. "That might get you fired."

Hilda walked over to the bra section of the store and began looking
through the different styles trying to find one she liked that was
available in her size. Several young couples had entered the store,
and all had done double takes, nonplussed to see this buxom beauty
parading around the store with her considerable assets bouncing and
jiggling as she walked. All were taken by surprise when the small
store was filled with the sound of fabric tearing as the men
experienced instantaneous and powerful erections that tore through
their clothing. The women looked at their men with shock and disdain
and began castigating Hilda for her public display.

"Hee hee hee," giggled Hilda, completely unashamedly. "I do tend to
have that effect on men."

"Let's get out of here," said one of the young women angrily,
grabbing her man by the arm. "Now!"

"But, sweetheart," he said, transfixed and not moving. "We just got
here. Don't you want to shop for your trousseau?"

"Not with that whore parading around half naked," she replied,
sneering at Hilda. "What a bimbo."

Grabbing her husband's arm, she literally dragged him out of the
store while the other women in attendance tried to do likewise.

"What a bunch of Puritans," said Hilda, laughing. "Why are people so
shocked to see a couple of big fucking titties?"

Hilda chose several bras to take back to the fitting room, all very
sexy styles, some even with a hole in the center of the cups to keep
the nipples uncovered.

"Come help me, baby," Hilda said, grabbing the young clerk by his
trouser clad wee wee and dragging him back to the fitting room. "I
need a man's opinion."

Hilda tried on various different styles and colours of bras, asking
the young lad's opinion with each one.

"How about this one, baby?" Hilda asked, modeling a daring see-
through black lace bra with push up cups. "Does this turn you on?"

"Oh, silly question," Hilda stated with a giggle, looking at the
front of his trousers.

"Obviously it does. Tee hee hee. Would you like to touch them, baby?"
she asked without hesitation. "You can if you like."

The handsome young lad reached out gingerly with his right hand and
gently touched one of her giant pillowy orbs so softly that it looked
as if he were afraid that touching them would cause them to break.

"Come on, darlin'," she encouraged him. "They aren't fragile."

The boy seemed hesitant, so Hilda asked him to put his hands out in
front of him, palms up, then once they were in place, moved closer,
placing a giant tittie in each of his hands. He had large, masculine
hands, but even they could not contain the totality of her impressive
endowments.

"Don't be shy, baby," Hilda told him in a motherly tone. "They won't
bite, honeybunch."

The young lad seemed reserved and somewhat overwhelmed, so Hilda took
hold of each of his hands with hers and made him stroke and knead her
soft, sweet smelling skin.

"Do you like that, sweetums?" she asked him in a breathy whisper, now
getting aroused herself. "I like it a lot, baby. You make Mama's
panties all wet."

Hilda cast her eyes lower and took in the huge bulge at the front of
the young lad's trousers.

"Oh, baby," Hilda moaned in a barely perceptible whisper. "Baby's big
boy seems so happy to see Mama, and Mama would love to see big boy,
yes she would."

Hilda assumed the position and grabbed the front of the boy's
trousers, pulling him closer to her. Taking hold of the metallic
zipper pull with her teeth, she lowered it gradually, eager to see
how big his male member was. Judging from the tent in his trousers,
she thought that he must be amazingly well endowed. She yanked the
clerk's navy blue Dockers down to his knees, then hurriedly grabbed
the waistband of his colourful silk boxers. Pulling them down, she
gazed at the turgid male organ before her and gasped at the length
and girth of it.

"Holy shit!" Hilda Humper exclaimed, surprised and excited at the
same time. "That is one big fellow you have there. I can't remember
seeing too many of them this big and I've certainly seen a lot of
them. Tee hee hee."

"Come to Mama, sweetie," Hilda cooed quite seductively. "Mama is
going to make Mr. Wee Wee feel sooooooooo spectacular."

"I've never been with a woman like this before," the boy confessed
shyly. "What are you going to do?"

"Oh, babycakes," Hilda whispered softly, becoming more and more
aroused. "I'm going to make you tickle and tingle all over, yes I am."

Hilda picked up one of her breasts and tweaked her nipple, watching
his face to see the effect it would have.

"Like what you see, baby?" she asked in a voice rife with
desire. "Come on, baby, don't you be shy with Hilda. There's only one
other tittie quite this pretty. They're a set. Hee hee hee."

Hilda sat down on the chair in the changing room and yanked the lad
closer by pulling on his enormous rock hard phallus.

"Wow. How big is he anyway?" Hilda inquired curiously. "About ten
inches would be my guess."

"Ten and a half to be exact," he said, setting her straight. "And
pretty thick too."

"Well, you just slap your pecker between my big ta tas and let's get
this show on the road," Hilda said eagerly. "I'm going to give your
boy a good tittie fucking, one you will always remember because it's
your first."

The clerk slid his fully tumescent weenie between Hilda's mammoth
mammaries while Hilda pressed her breasts inward, forming a tight
sheath. His member was so long that a couple of inches stuck out at
the top. Hilda couldn't quite reach to take the overflow in her
mouth, but she could stick out her tongue and tickle the tip of his
wee wee, and did so, eliciting a low moan of pleasure.

"Okay, sweetie," she instructed, using her teacher's voice. "You
start thrusting and you will see how good you can feel. Come on,
baby."

The eager salesman slammed his rod between her titties a bit roughly,
causing Hilda to admonish him.

"Take it easy, boy," she said. "If you keep that up you'll come way
too soon and miss all the fun."

Taking it slower and more gently, the handsome clerk thrust his willy
between her breasts, amazed at how good it felt.

"Wow," he told Hilda in astonishment. "If I knew it would feel this
damn good, I wouldn't have waited so long."

He thrust into her cleavage forcefully, his breath becoming laboured
as he felt the passion threaten to overwhelm him.

"Oh my goodness," he called out. "This fucking rocks, lady."

Every now and again he would stop thrusting, and Hilda would take
advantage of the opportunity and playfully tickle the head of his
magic wand with her tongue, even tickling his pee wee pee pee pole
hole until he laughed out loud.

"Oh, that tickles," he called out. "But don't stop. I like it."

Hilda pushed her breasts together more tightly, forming a very snug
tunnel around his plunging pecker.

"Oh, fuck!" he yelled out loudly. "I can't hold off any longer. Oh,
damn."

A few more thrusts and he was a goner, his member quivering as it
shot stream after stream of hot, wet jism onto Hilda's upper chest
and chin.

"Oh, sweetiekins," she squealed delightedly. "You made lots of nice
baby puddin' for Mama to enjoy.....oh, yeah."

Once he was spent, Hilda released him from her cleavage prison and
raised her hands to smear his boy butter all over her chest and
titties.

"Oh, yes," Hilda exclaimed. "I just love the feel of cum on my
titties. It makes them so soft."

Sticking out her tongue, she lapped up the stray morsels on her chin
and lips and swallowed them eagerly, not wanting to neglect even a
drop.

"Well, um...........oh," Hilda giggled inanely. "I just realized I
don't even know your name, sweetie. It seems only fitting that we
should introduce ourselves. Tee hee hee. We have been pretty
intimate. Hee hee hee."

"Trevor," he said quietly. "My name is Trevor."

"Well, Trevor, I'm Hilda and I am so glad to make your acquaintance."

Hilda grabbed his waning erection and lapped up all traces of their
little private encounter.

"Mama always likes to leave her wee wees just the way she finds them,
yes she does. Hee hee hee."

"Well, I must get back to work," said the boy, not sure what else to
say. "But thank you. That was fun."

Hilda took a hanky from her purse and wiped the still wet semen from
her chest and neck and then walked back out onto the sales floor,
still topless.

"Just point me to the panties," Miss Humper called out to her
erstwhile lover as he tried to attend to another customer. "Thongs
and g-strings if you have them."

Hilda found some very exciting and sexy panties, even a few
crotchless ones that several of her lovers had suggested she buy.

"No," she said to herself. "Most men find it far more exciting if
they stick their hand up your skirt and you are not wearing panties
at all, and Hilda Humper always aims to please. Tee hee hee."

Hilda looked at some silk camisoles and also found some very pretty
silky lace teddies.

"Oh, these are so sexy," she squealed excitedly. "No man could resist
a woman wearing these."

Hilda took one off of its hanger and tried it on before a full length
mirror mounted on the wall of the store.

"Oh, my," said the clerk, looking towards her. "You look so hot in
that, Hilda. You really do."

"I would love to buy them, but there really doesn't seem to be much
point," replied Hilda. "Whenever I wear things like this, they last
about twenty seconds and then they're on the floor. Kind of a waste
of money. Tee hee hee."

Hilda returned to her dressing room and put her clothes on, touching
up her makeup and running a comb quickly through her hair.

"Thank you for all your help, loverboy," the buxom bimbo called out
to the clerk as she left. "You've been a prince. By the way, what
time do you get off work, sweetie?"

"Why, I get off in fifteen minutes, Ma'am, why do you ask?"

"Well, you're such a sweet boy," Hilda responded coyly. " I thought
you might like to meet me outside at my car for a little bit of slap
and tickle after a hard day's work, what do you think?"

"Why, yes. I'd like that," the salesclerk replied somewhat
shyly. "I'd like that a whole lot, Ma'am."

"Good," Hilda replied with great satisfaction. "See you soon,
sweetie." Walking away, Hilda turned slightly in the direction of the
clerk and, placing a hand under each of her breasts, raised them up
and jiggled them in unision, making her whole chest shimmy and sway
provocatively. "See you very soon, sweetcheeks, tee hee hee."

Half an hour later.........
"Oh, your big fuckstick is stretching my pussy walls, oh yesssssss!"
Hilda exclaimed loudly as the young salesman pushed his both lengthy
and girthy male appendage into her willing and well lubricated love
tunnel up to the hilt, his balls slapping audibly against her large,
round, sexy ass.

"Ohhhhh, wee wee me, wee wee me," she squealed in childish delight as
he pummeled into so hard that her breasts were bouncing and jiggling
wildly on her chest, occasionally moving enough to slap her on the
underside of her pretty chin. "Dick me hard, dick me deep, dick me
fast! Make Momma's kittycat purr! Create some friction, tee hee."

Her ass bounced against the back seat of her car as the young man
thrust forcefully into her, and she raised her ass in unison with his
movements so that their two pelvises rammed together, lubricating the
space between their bodies with a thin sheen of perspiration. Leaning
his face towards her, he was able to catch a bouncing breast with his
mouth, creating suction with his lips until her pert pink nipple was
drawn into his waiting orifice then sucked on with all the gusto of a
starving man at a buffet.

"Oh yes, suck my boobies, suck my nipples, nurse me, nurse me," she
cried out, her head falling backwards with the sheer pleasure of it.
Raising her legs from where they rested against his back, she placed
them over his broad shoulders and locked them behind his neck so that
his battering ram was driven so deeply inside her that she could feel
him against her cervix. "Oh, you're a big, deep fucker!" she
screamed, "Do me harder, do me harder, oh yes, hit my ribs, hit my
ribs, ohhhhhh, yesssssssss!"

The young clerk turned his attentions to her other nipple and with
every draw on it, Hilda felt a pleasure so intense that it was akin
to pain, but a pain that she didn't want to stop.

"Oh yes, hurt me good, hurt me so fucking good," she cried out
breathlessly as her nails raked his back and her legs tightened their
grip around his neck, nearly squeezing the life out of him.

"Whoa, hold on there," he told her, breaking his stride and removing
his lips from her nipple with an audible pop. "I can barely breathe!"

"Who cares how well you can fucking breathe?" she screamed out from
between lips clenched together as she concentrated on the pleasurable
sensations coursing through her entire body. "I'm about to have a
fucking orgasm here and you're worried about breathing? Why are some
men so fucking selfish? Who would possibly think about breathing when
I'm trying to fucking come? Now please stop whining and get
thrusting, I'm almost there, baby!"

Doing as he was told, the boy raised his bottom between her splayed
legs and plunged her depths again, repeating the motion over and over
again as fast as he was able to withdraw his rigid johnson from her
slick slot and drive it home again.

"Oh yes, that's the ticket, that's the fucking ticket," Hilda moaned,
her breasts heaving with every ragged inhalation and exhalation that
she drew into and out of her chest. "Plunder my pussy, plug my hole,
pummel my cervix, stretch my cunny, make me come, baby, do it, do it,
do it!"

They moved together in the dance of love, their bodies so close
together that neither of them really remembered where one ended and
the other began. It was a hot, humid evening and their faces and
bodies were slick with sweat as they fucked mindlessly, lost in
pleasure, floating above themselves, oblivous to the comings and
goings in the parking lot surrounding them, oblivious to everything
except the mating of their bodies and the sensations of exquisite
pleasure that were being sent from their bodies to be interpreted by
their minds.

"Oh shit! Oh fuck! Oh god! I'm coming!" Hilda screamed out, her whole
body trembling and shaking with the intense pleasure of her orgasm,
her pussy walls vibrating with the force of it. "Come with me baby,
now sweetie, let's come together, oh yeah."

Her head rolled from side to side and she moaned so quietly that it
was almost a sigh as her orgasm continued to be felt through every
facet of her being and she was delighted when she felt the first
spurts of semen ejected from the mushroom head of his penis and
splash forcefully against her insides.

"Oh give it to me, give it all to me," she cried out, feeling his
warm wetness filling her. "Give me all your wee wee juice, your baby
batter, your jizz, your wad, your load, ohhhhhhhhhh. I want it ALL,
baby."

She tightened her inner vaginal muscles until she had his still
pulsating penis in a tight grip, the sensation nearly driving him
wild, intensifying his orgasm to the point that he almost felt on the
verge of losing consciousness, something he used all his force of
will to resist, so great was his fear of missing even a nanosecond of
this buxom blonde's sweet torture.

Finally spent, the young lad collapsed and rolled away from Hilda,
his slowly waning erection dragged from her body with a sloppy wet
sound as his weight pulled it out of her.

"Oh Ma'am, that was a doozy," Trevor said weakly, his chest still
heaving and his respirations sounding like a locomotive struggling up
a steep incline. "You know, for an older woman, you sure are a hot
lay."

"Thank you sweetie," Hilda purred softly against his left ear as she
lay beside him, trying to get her own pulse and breathing under
control. "I sure do love the young cocks, tee hee hee."

"Well, I guess I had better be getting home," said Hilda, reaching
for her clothing and sitting up in the car. "I have been gone for
hours and my children will be wondering where I am."

"Yeah, I better get going too," replied the young lad, reaching for
his boxers. "My mom will start to get worried if I'm not home soon, I
told her I'd come straight home after work. Besides, I need to get
home and get to bed, I have to be at work early tomorrow morning."

"Speaking of work," said Hilda, sporting a sly smile on her pretty,
delicately featured face and grabbing his almost flaccid wee wee in
her small, well manicured hand. "I hope this means I'll get a
discount next time, sweetie. Do we have a deal?"

"Yeah, sure," he responded, grabbing a handful of breast and
squeezing it roughly. "If you promise to suck my dick next time, that
is."

"Then we have a deal, tee hee hee," said Hilda beginning to get
dressed, but wishing she had time to suck it right then and there. "I
might be shopping at your store regularly from now on, tee hee."

An hour later, Hilda turned the car into her driveway and put it into
park before stepping out and locking the door behind her and setting
the alarm.

"Finally," said Harriet angrily to her mother when she entered the
house. "Where have you been? You've been shopping for hours and I was
starting to get worried. Where are all the parcels?"

"Oh," responded Hilda, smiling at her daughter fondly. "I just
couldn't find a thing to wear, but I did meet a very helpful sales
clerk at the Lingerie Chest. You should go there sometime, Harriet, I
think you'd like him too. Just be sure to ask for Trevor."

THE END